Back in July, I wrote about the Tink Vs. Mom Hair Wars. To recap – we were supposed to be doing Locks for Love. We went the hair salon where Gwen, our favorite stylist, pointed out that 10 inches would mean Tink’s hair would be in a bob. This activated Tink’s Bob Alert System . . . “Warning! Warning! Fashionable, chic yet manageable hair style ahead. Avoid at all costs. Warning! Warning!” and it was a no go. She got her hair cut to just below her shoulders and figured she’d do Locks of love next time. I declared victory because she cut her hair to a more manageable length, but I think I was stretching the idea of victory a bit. It’s just that after several years of hair brushing whine fests and arguments about pony tails and tangles and “Keep that hair out of your food!” conversations, I was really done with the whole hair thing. She could just have long ratty hair; I gave up.
Imagine my surprise when this video message came through on my phone the other night.
I immediately wished I had some kind of Bat signal that would work with my stylist, Gwen. I could shine a big light that projected a pair of shears up into the sky. Emergency! Emergency! Hair emergency! I wanted to get her into the salon immediately before she changed her mind!
But Gwen is a phenomenal stylist. The appointment was going to have to wait for almost 2 weeks. I was positive Tink would change her mind, but she didn’t. Not only did she not change her mind, she picked out a bob hairstyle. Her bob phobia seems to have disappeared as rapidly as it came.
On Tuesday, we went to see our friend, Gwen, and Tink got an awesome new hair cut. She loved it because it’s easy and No More Hairbrushing Fights! I loved it because it’s super cute, really suits her and No More Hairbrushing Fights!
Tink went to bed grinning ear to ear about her new ‘do. The next morning she was excited to head off to school and show all her kids her new hair cut. She was subdued when I picked her up at the end of the day, though.
“Did anyone notice your new haircut?” I asked on the drive home.
“Yes. Everyone did,” she mumbled from the back seat. I glanced in the rear view mirror. She was slumped down in her seat, her chin to her chest, eyes down, the perfect picture of dejection.
“What happened?” I asked.
And then she told me the whole sad story. Some of the other kids told her they liked her hair, but far more told her that she looked like a boy and her hair was a nightmare. One girl told her that now she had fat hair like her fat face.
Kids can be such assholes sometimes.
When we got home, Tink barricaded herself in her room and cried, so sad about the haircut she had wanted and adored only 12 hours before. I was furious and swung into action.
1. I phoned the school guidance counselor who agreed to meet with Tink the next day and the child who made the fat face comment (which was the one that hurt Tink’s feelings the most.) That alone made Tink feel better.
2. I texted my friend, Laurie, the mother of Tink’s BFF. Tink’s BFF had not yet seen her hair, so I drove Tink down to their house where the BFF and her big sister gushed over the new hair with such enthusiasm that I believe Tink started to get suspicious.
3. I threw up a status update on Facebook to express my anger at the mean girls. Within minutes, my phone started vibrating with reply notifications. This topic seemed to strike a nerve. Twenty-nine people responded to tell Tink that 1. she looks great and 2. mean girls suck. I read most of the responses to Tink and the more I read, the more she smiled.
The very best message came from our very, awesome friend, GenieAlisa. She went so far as to send Tink a video about her awesome hair.
Tink said, “I didn’t know a movie star had my hair!”
It was really sweet to have so many people chime in, and it completely counteracted all the mean things that were said to her at school. Today, the counselor met with Tink. Apologies happened from the other girls and Tink is back to loving her awesome hair.
Suck it, mean girls.